18 April 2017

Summer of Tripe and Fun Launch Postponed

The launch of Tripe'17, a three-month long programme of music and arts events sponsored by the Tripe Marketing Board has been postponed following the imminent announcement of a General Election campaign in the UK.

Tripe retailers had been advised to order additional supplies in response to an expected increase in demand following the planned launch on 8 June 2017.  TMB chairman Sir Norman Wrassle said it was now too late to reverse these orders and apologised if this led to a glut of tripe.


With the first performance by the re-united The Incredible G String Band since they broke up in 1978, and the legendary Beat Boys reprising their 2014 Be More Cow campaign appearance, the launch event promised to be a spectacular start to the summer.


The West Coast sound of The Beat Boys, whose slightly off-key harmonies captured perfectly the sounds of a Lancashire summer - burgers sizzling, bingo calling and torrential rain - have not performed together since 2006, when they re-formed as a tribute band to The Pleasure Beach Boys, themselves a Beat Boys tribute band.

Band member Byron Watson, who has not appeared in public since he became addicted to cleaning the house and refused to go on tour, said he was disappointed at the postponement of the launch, adding "I have been in treatment and was now ready to hit the road again." 

As part of the campaign, the TMB planned to re-issue their finest album, Pit Sounds and their compilation album, Endless Winter.

TMB chairman Sir Norman Wrassle said: "This is going to take a bit of rescheduling, but we could well be looking at the UK's first ever Autumn of Tripe and Fun."

4 April 2017

TMB denies pandering to Greeks and Christians

The Tripe Marketing Board has reacted angrily to accusations that it is pandering to Christians and Greeks by promoting an Easter Tripe Soup recipe on its website.

Pizza Mageiritsa? No - it's a popular Easter soup!
The claim was made by militant atheist vegans at a meeting in Hebden Bridge earlier today.  Responding to the suggestion, TMB chairman Sir Norman Wrassle told Tim Lovelace of the Lancashire Radio show Tea Time With Tim: "It's preposterous for anyone to think that we only want Greek people and Christians to eat tripe at Easter - we want them to eat tripe all year round."  Sir Norman went on to add that using the term 'Easter Tripe' was merely a 'seasonal marketing ploy' to draw people's attention to what is a popular soup in many parts of Greece at this time of year.

"It's actually called Mageiritsa - so it sounds a bit like a tasty Italian pizza.  Who knows - it might one day be as popular, too!" Sir Norman said.